Fire Down Below Gynazule Book 1 eBook Debra Anastasia
Download As PDF : Fire Down Below Gynazule Book 1 eBook Debra Anastasia 
Praise for Fire Down Below
"I'd like to remove myself from this spam list." ~Teresa Mummert NYT Bestselling Author
"No." ~Jamie McGuire #1 NYT Bestselling Author
"Do not read her next book. Trust me." Colleen Hoover #1 NYT Bestselling Author
"I have not read this book." ~ Aesta's Book Blog
"If this book is anything like her crazy tweets, then we are too scared to read it." ~ The Rock Stars of Romance Book Blog
"Debra is the queen of s@!ts and giggles." ~ Tijan NYT Bestselling Author
Summary
Dove Glitch is embarrassed about everything above her knees and below her belly button. When she has to fill a delicate, embarrassing prescription the last thing she needs is a sexy-as-hell (and brand spanking new) pharmacist behind the counter.
Johnson Fitzwell’s first day of his dream career also happens to coincide with the exact moment Dove needs her feminine meds filled. His glorious voice is way too loud–as in, he should be counting down the hits with Ryan Seacrest kind of loud. Thanks to Johnson’s handsome face and gorgeous jaw line, Dove dives headlong into her waking nightmare and asks for a vagina-scented cream.
How could she not fall for him? Dove's only active goal now is to get Johnson to kiss her right on the lips. Either set. However, his horrible girlfriend is one of many obstacles preventing her from making that fantasy a reality. When Dove defends Johnson in the most unhygienic, unconventionally gross way in the middle of a crowded restaurant, their tender, slightly tantric relationship is off to a galloping, farting start. Each print copy of this book will be dipped in holy water by my mom and glared at by my father as he purses his lips. Neither will help. So, drop your pants, turn to the left and cough. I hope you're not allergic to latex, because it’s time to fill your prescription. Anally.
More Praise
"Crap. Why won't you go away?" K.A. Robinson NYT Bestselling Author
"You couldn't pay me enough." Tara Sue Me NYT Bestselling Author
"You can't be serious." JM Darhower USA Today Bestselling Author
"That's a big, tall glass of nope." Angie Lynch CEO and President of Shameless Book Club
"This book is about as cringe-worthy as a raging UTI." Helena Hunting Amazing Author
"This book gave my vagina nightmares for a week. What the hell was Debra thinking?!" ~Leisa Rayven Amazing Author
"I like to read Debra's work on the crapper in case I run out of toilet paper." CJ Roberts NYT Bestselling Author
"I've had the worst gas since I read Debra Anastasia's latest. Rip, full, wretched gas that singes my butt hairs on the way out. A week later I'm still walking funny." Kendall Grey Amazing Author
"This cover gives me vaginal discomfort. Someone pass the Monistat." Tara Sivec NYT Bestselling Author
"I might read this book if I wasn't so afraid of catching something." Tina Reber NYT Bestselling Author
"It itches so bad." Ella Fox USA Today Bestselling Author
"Can I un-read this? No? Do you have holy water so I can wash my eyes?" - King Midian
“Is this the gas lady with the flatulence problem that can do the bubble tricks with her vagina?” Totally Booked Blog
“Never Again. Disappointed! And just like Tony, I don’t like to be disappointed.” Aleatha Romig NYT Bestselling Author
“Penivores and Vagitarians both agree. It made them vomit a little in their mouths.” Georgia Cates NYT Bestselling Author
“This book smells like grilled cheese and sadness.” Mary Elizabeth Amazing Author
“Enough to cause a burning ring of fire. Please Debra…just stop!” Belle Aurora USA Today Bestselling Author
“The only way fire should be associated with this book is if it was actually on fire. Burning in my fireplace.” Jillian from Read-Love-Blog
“Is she writing about hairy vaginas or explosive diarrhea?” Neda from The Sub Club
“This book caused my anus to grow a steel-plated hymen.” Shay Savage USA Today
“Save your receipt.” Liv Morris Amazing Author
“Who is this woman and why is she talking to me?” Tabatha V
Fire Down Below Gynazule Book 1 eBook Debra Anastasia
First, if you have seen the author's promos that she has been posting, and you find them to be offensive? Don't read this book. You have to be open to laughing about anything crude in life. Because, let's face it...sh** happens.And it happens repeatedly in this romantic comedy, which really reads more like a romantic farce. Dove meets the pharmacist of her dreams while picking up a script for a yeast infection. Johnson (yes, this is the pharmacist's name and that made me laugh, too) has a booming voice when referring to the safety measures and so forth to do with the cream she is picking up.
The story that follows is a one epic fail after another; fails that are so funny you will find yourself almost p*ssing yourself while reading. Seriously. I was reading while in bed and I rolled right out of it, into the floor, laughing.
The story is funny not only because of epic and sometimes embarrassing fails on the parts of Dove and Johnson, but you have the best set of supporting characters EVER. Dove's neighbor, Duke. Steve the cat. Dove's two best friends. The manager at the store where Johnson works. A hot dog vendor that will give you the creeps. And Mr. and Mrs. Anastasia - who are freaking comedy gold.
I loved this book, and I highly recommend it to any reader - male OR female - who isn't offended by fart jokes in particular, but crude humor as well. You might should read it at home where the bathroom is handy when you need to use it.
Product details
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Tags : Amazon.com: Fire Down Below (Gynazule Book 1) eBook: Debra Anastasia: Kindle Store,ebook,Debra Anastasia,Fire Down Below (Gynazule Book 1),Debra Anastasia,FICTION Romance Romantic Comedy,HUMOR Topic Relationships
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Fire Down Below Gynazule Book 1 eBook Debra Anastasia Reviews
Let me preface this review by saying I'm a HUGE HUGE HUGE fan of the Poughkeepsie book series! I think I'm having a hard time coming up with just the right words to use to review this rom com series. So since I'm supposed to be an open book here are my thoughts
1. I nearly didn't finish this book. Although there were many funny parts to it, I almost felt like the author was trying too hard to be grotesquely funny (which may have been her goal all along and that's great!) So I ended up closing my kindle about half way through....except...I've never NOT read an entire book. I was feeling pretty guilty AND hahaha I just wanted to know what was going to happen to Dove.
2. I continued reading and I'm glad I did!
3. I'm not sure I understand the point of Shannon's story...or the Anasatasia's story for that matter.
4. Although the things that were happening between Dove and Johnson were a bit predictable (which I usually don't mind at all) I could see Duke's future and was interested to see how this weird crazy story was going to play out )
5. I never mind that things may be "unbelievable" or wouldn't really happen in real life. That's what reading stories is all about. We don't all meet hunky guys with lots of junk either but we all love reading about it! It's called imagination! Well done for coming up with this crazy hot mess! )
OMG!!! This book was sooooo funny that I was afraid I was going to wake the entire house at 2am laughing. I couldn't put it down and read it in one night. All the characters in this apartment building with Dove, are characters in themselves. From her neighbor who Never closes his door, to the porn-author upstairs, to her 2 best friends (one stuck in past trends and one who only speaks 10 words a day), how can any relationship be normal? Dove who is embarrassed to buy feminine products let alone go to the pharmacy to get a second prescription for a feminine issue, mets hot new Pharmacist Johnson Fitzgerald, she looks to get more than just her prescription filled. But Friends, neighbors, an ex-fiance and a Penis Piercing gone wrong, can Dove and Johnson get past everything and move their sweet attraction forward? Or will Dove's screwed up luck prevent her from becoming her Twitter handle? This is a cliff hanger and I can't wait till book two to see how this ends!!!
OMG!!! She didn’t! This story had me cracking up from the first page. It’s too much! I just couldn’t help it!!!! I totally love Duke. He’s a real man and he has no qualms about his actions. He’s a farting machine!
Dove has sensitive girlie issues and she went to a pharmacy to fill a prescription for a UTI that she contracted. She bumped into Johnson who’s a sexy green eyed pharmacist. She’s trying to do the dirty but a whole host of problems is preventing them from doing the deed. From messing her pants, to piercing Duke who is her resident apartment neighbor body part. But what she doesn’t know is that Duke silently has feelings for her. And he always seems to come to her rescue when she screws up and that’s a lot of times. So while she is busy pursuing Johnson, Duke is there being her silent hero.
After a night of messy sex with Johnson whereby Duke overheard their entire encounter, Johnson sends her a text the morning after telling her he will be busy for the rest of the following week and he has an event to attend with his ex gf Beth. Dove is shattered but Duke is there for her. I’m so disappointed this book ended in a cliffy. I can’t wait to read the next book to find out what happens.
I wish I can unread all the craziness that is written in this book. They are too hilarious. Everything that can go wrong went wrong for Dove. And oh boy crap really hit the ceiling. If you need full belly busting laugh then this is the book for you!!!
First, if you have seen the author's promos that she has been posting, and you find them to be offensive? Don't read this book. You have to be open to laughing about anything crude in life. Because, let's face it...sh** happens.
And it happens repeatedly in this romantic comedy, which really reads more like a romantic farce. Dove meets the pharmacist of her dreams while picking up a script for a yeast infection. Johnson (yes, this is the pharmacist's name and that made me laugh, too) has a booming voice when referring to the safety measures and so forth to do with the cream she is picking up.
The story that follows is a one epic fail after another; fails that are so funny you will find yourself almost p*ssing yourself while reading. Seriously. I was reading while in bed and I rolled right out of it, into the floor, laughing.
The story is funny not only because of epic and sometimes embarrassing fails on the parts of Dove and Johnson, but you have the best set of supporting characters EVER. Dove's neighbor, Duke. Steve the cat. Dove's two best friends. The manager at the store where Johnson works. A hot dog vendor that will give you the creeps. And Mr. and Mrs. Anastasia - who are freaking comedy gold.
I loved this book, and I highly recommend it to any reader - male OR female - who isn't offended by fart jokes in particular, but crude humor as well. You might should read it at home where the bathroom is handy when you need to use it.
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